Do they Realize the Damage they are Doing, or Even Care?

This is far from a rant  blog.  I strive to maintain a positive and fresh atmosphere here, and be somewhat informative.  This evening something truly disturbed me though.

My daughter and I went to one of those big box discount stores tonight, to pick up some groceries.  She sat in the carriage and looked around, while I shopped.  I try not to dally too long in one spot, so she won’t get bored and cranky.  She was her usual pretty well behaved self.  The store was busy and many children were accompanying their parents.  None were being bratty.  In two cases, I can not say the same for their parents.

Two women (mother & daughter it seemed) were shopping with a little girl, about four years old. The child was standing in the aisle quietly and wasn’t touching anything.  The woman that appeared to be the mother of this child, told her to “get out of the way”, then less than a minute later nagged the child with expletives, and told her she would be spanked because she doesn’t listen.  This was said in such a nasty voice I had no doubt, she would carry through.  We ran into this group again two aisles later, and the two women were arguing with each other, but it was obvious that much of their irritation with each other was being taken out on this child.  She was once again being scolded, when she seemed to be behaving just fine. The nagging continued, as they moved on.  I felt so bad for this little girl.  She is bound to be a depressed, insecure or at the very least troubled kid in the future. 

In the very next aisle, a young boy, who appeared to be about five years old.  Wandered in front of his mother’s shopping cart.  She angrily exclaimed “If you step in front of this carriage one more time I SWEAR, I’ll run you over with it!”.  I think the look my toddler gave her, made her realize how inappropriately she had just behaved, and she scurried off with her son in tow.

I am by no means a perfect parent, and I understand stress can get to people, but these parents were simply out of control.  In both cases, it was not a mother with multiple active  kids to keep an eye on, just one relatively sedate child.  The over-reactions I witnessed from these parents, for the smallest of infractions (real or perceived) were in my opinion verbally abusive.  I hate to imagine how they behave towards these young children at home.

I don’t spank my daughter. *  I don’t holler, scream, threaten or swear at her.  I love her.  She is still a toddler so most discipline for her is simply redirection & being consistent in what she is not allowed to do.  I’m an older mom with a degree in psychology, which might make me look at the parenting process a little differently, but I doubt many people would speak to their dogs the way these people did to their children. 

Are these people simply so mean spirited or scarred, that they can’t even treat their own children with simple kindness?

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* While I don’t chose to spank my daughter, many loving parents occasionally have to resort to this punishment.  This article is not about discipline, it is about cruelty.